THE ULTIMATE SUCKLIST

© by Gary the assassin - originated 1982

latest entry: (08/13/2018)

This is a chronilogically ordered list; It is not in the order of things that suck the most. When I have more time, I will add the dates of entry for every item on the list. I did not start dating them until entry number 177 in June of 1986.

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001. Conway Twitty
002. Fog
003. Static
004. Gary Kumm
005. Hanna Green
006. Mentally deficient
007. Foreigners
008. Russia
009. Iran
010. Libya
011. Argentina
012. Colombia
013. Cuba
014. Mexico
015. Soap (TV Show)
016. Budweiser commercials
017. Marvin Gaye
018. Kim Carnes
019. Southern states
020. Musical artists (except those I have recordings of)
021. Small towns
022. Modern art
023. Paintings that look like a circle with a box but are sold for $1,000,000
024. 1st 4 chapters of Frankenstein + ch 7
025. Menudo
026. Oedipus
027. Coffee
028. Bump in Ber's car
029. Mary Shelly
030. Monday's
031. People who complain about worthless shit
032. Kidsday
033. Gray stain
034. Ugly fat shit's
035. O.P.E.C.
036. Religious fanatics
037. Jehovah's Witnesses
038. Little putz from WKRP
039. Nassau Cable Company
040. Unions
041. TAN & COT graphs
042. Bloachers
043. Grammy, Emmy awards, Oscars
044. People who write stupid songs for commercials
045. Licking book stickers
046. Table legs when I sit near them
047. Beaches
048. Cathy comics
049. Fame (TV show, movie, song, etc.)
050. Diplomats
051. Criminals
052. James Watt
053. Kurt Vonnegut Jr. (his mother, house, brother, etc.)
054. Joan Rivers' clapping
055. Sunglasses
056. Harper Lee
057. Book of Lists #2
058. Patricia Neal's voice
059. Leaky Pens
060. Transvestitied Culture Club members
061. Britain's Police Hats
062. Fucked-up jet-streams
063. Mike Hargrove
064. All Popes
065. Upper Class
066. Peter Tosh
067. Sam Goody
068. Bell Telephone Company
069. Sports Illustrated
071. Frank Messer
072. Publicity about Prince William
073. Bhagwan & followers
074. Person who lives across from Wiff
075. Olympic Coffee Shop
076. Cristy Lane
077. Mobile life form living in the Hamlet
078. Bugs that attack people
079. Lee McPhail
080. Radio stations overplaying their shit
081. Miss Piggy
082. New York Post
083. Andre Gromyko
084. Farmer's Market
085. Traffic
086. Gospel singers
087. People who don't use turn signals
088. My life (10/1 - 12/1/83)
089. Waitress at H.M.S.
090. Cashier 21 at 2:11 of MVB on 8/2/83
091. Shoelaces lacking aglets
092. Usher at Sunrise Mall Theater
093. Trucks and buses on roads
094. Record World
095. Those 6 traffic lights on Hmstd Tpk
096. Cabbage Patch Dolls
097. 8:00am classes
098. Public TV begging for money
099. Dried-out pulp in Oranges
100. Salt
101. The weather channel
102. Solid Gold
103. Teen Week on Wheel of Fortune
104. Extreme weather conditions
105. Video disk games
106. Having a cold
107. The music channel
108. Vinnie Mascoli
109. Andrew Anselmo
110. Parking lots
111. Logarithms
112. Olympics
113. PL/1
114. Potholes
115. Clouds
116. Pain
117. Regal deli
118. Break dancing
119. Poetry
120. Monday April 9th, 1984
121. Remixes
122. Minnesota Metrodome
123. People who drive at least 55 MPH on the highway
124. Locking keys in car
125. McDonald's
126. My GPA in spring '84
127. Sunrise Mall movie theater
128. The Shoe Box (stores that have Help wanted signs but don't want it)
129. Rain
130. Luis Farrakhan
131. Sports phone
132. Minimum wage
133. Beautiful Visions
134. 9/10 people I stain decks for
135. UA movie introductions
136. Porti-potti's
137. Lane 3 of alpine slide at Action Park
138. New Jersey
139. Joe Forge
140. Unsynchronized traffic lights
141. Stevie Wonder's hair
142. Roger Grimsbey's physical appearance
143. MTV
144. Ziggy
145. Norlee Distributors
146. FBI & CIA
147. Other time zones
148. Being a tourist
149. Hollywood, California
150. Accidents
151. Waiting
152. Creative Computing
153. The Price Is Right
154. Terrorists
155. Game show hosts
156. Improper recapping of soda bottles
157. Bar Mitzvah and wedding bands
158. Aids
159. Lilco
160. Pro wrestling
161. Kids who hang out in arcades
162. Actors on "Sale Of The Century"
163. Sunday Daily News
164. Spiral notebooks
165. Plastic record sleeves
166. Beacon Theater seating arrangement
167. CMJ music awards' audience
168. Squeaky brakes
169. Splinters
170. Extended eye twitching
171. Tailgaters
172. Saxophones
173. Artificial hearts
174. Hand dryers
175. Sunday's
176. Commercial radio stations
177. Disco
178. "Baby on board" signs
179. Crazy Eddie service dept.
180. Commercial jingles
181. Synthesizer music
182. People who charge things who are on line ahead of me
183. Anyone who is easily offended
184. All politician and bureaucrats
185. Emergency broadcasting system tests
186. Pledging
187. American record companies
188. Lincoln Savings Bank
189. Organization of Resident Students
190. PMRC
191. Plea bargaining
192. Moral majority
193. FCC
194. PTL
195. TV evangelists
196. Sleeping in the woods
197. American criminal justice system
198. Dealing with U.S. Customs
199. Max Headroom
200. Movies about Vietnam
201. Village police forces
202. Integrated Motorist Information System
203. Dealing with assholes
204. Toyota windshield wipers
205. Speaker phones
206. Rap music & people who like it
207. The redneck announcer from Seaman's commercials
208. Microwave ovens
209. TV dance shows
210. Tiffany
211. King Kullen's photo dept.
212. People who use the words "dude" & "babe"
213. Smoke from cigarettes, cigars, pipes, etc.
214. 1988 balk rule
215. Stripped screw heads
216. Fat in food
217. People who name their kids after themselves
218. Gas stations that charge for air
219. European style cars
220. Exhaust fumes
221. Magazine inserts
222. Fogged-up windshields
223. People who name their kids a derivative of their last name
224. People who rhyme their kids names to their last name
225. "Dial it" lines
226. The Brawley bunch
227. Far eastern Long Island
228. The French
229. Nationally televised baseball games
230. Clichés
231. Fake announcer's voices
232. AM radio & people who listen to it regularly
233. Pre-printed material with fake signatures
234. Bethpage library
235. Ethnic names
236. Call waiting
237. The three stooges
238. Bob Hope specials
239. Money hungry defense lawyers
240. Paparazzi
241. Homosexuals
242. Supermarket tabloids
243. Talk shows' audiences
244. Exploitation by advertisers of holidays
245. Junk mail
246. Stupid acronyms used by organizations
247. Women bodybuilders
248. The news asking people, "What will you do if you won Lotto?"
249. People who use elevators to go 1 floor
250. Famous people endorsing products
251. The California Raisins
252. Flat head haircuts (a.k.a. Nefertite do)
253. Elvis-mania
254. Guido's and their cars
255. Guido clothing stores
256. People who fix things that aren't broken
257. Vanity plates
258. Long-haired heavy metal dirtbags
259. Neon color clothing
260. Fax machines
261. Fads
262. Sun shades for cars
263. Fluorescent lights
264. Phone numbers that are supposed to spell words but the word has more letters than digits
265. People who bring crying babies to public places
266. Snoring
267. Modern day concept of encores
268. People who don't use 12am & 12pm correctly
269. Multiplex movie theaters
270. Buzzwords in the press
271. Senator Jesse Helms
272. Pro-lifers
273. The Yellow Pages
274. Satellite beeping noises
275. Iraq
276. Cars with only one headlight
277. Outdoor telephone booths that aren't enclosed
278. People who say they'll call you back, but they don't
279. Frivolous lawsuits
280. Homeless people
281. Those 30 minute info-mercials
282. People who look in a different direction while reading from cue cards
283. Personnel agencies
284. Elephant pants
285. Big hair
286. Fake breasts
287. People who mispronounce nuclear as nucular
288. XT computers
289. Welfare
290. Automatic seatbelts
291. Overuse of the word "actually"
292. Girls who put their makeup on as they drive
293. Car alarms
294. Recessed manhole covers
295. Segue's on the news
296. Voice mail
297. Trendy names
298. Gas pumps that trickle to a finish
299. Protestor chants
300. Fountain soda
301. The Wiz
302. Policies concerning smoking/non-smoking areas
303. Valet parking
304. Christmas when it's not!
305. People who throw cigarette butts out their car windows
306. Fake snow in movies an on TV
307. Cordless phones
308. Spike Lee
309. Microsoft
310. Advertisements for a particular date after the fact
311. People who wear baseball caps backwards
312. People with clean cut haircuts but long haggard hair in the back
313. Commercials with hyperactive camera movements
314. Vehicles making turns by first lurching in the opposite direction
315. Politically correct
316. Food courts
317. Woodstock '94
318. Sunday morning radio
319. Censorship
320. Hyperactive children
321. America's eating habits
322. Kennedy Airport
323. Onions
324. People who mispronounce "Often" and "Ask"
325. Canker Sores
326. People who drive while slouched toward the middle of the car
327. Tangled phone cords
328. When clothing material gets caught in the zipper
329. High fructose corn syrup
330. Letterman's Top 10 lists
331. Shtick
332. Button fly jeans
333. The "...For Dummies" books
334. When the table of contents is not on the first page
335. Team nicknames that don't end in "S"
336. Pre-made hamburgers
337. Those stupid nose band-aid's that football players wear
338. People who don't wash their hands after urinating
339. Circuit City (01/04/98)
340. Kenneth Starr & Linda Tripp (01/30/98)
341. The phrase "spin doctors" and all its derivations (03/30/98)
342. Putting your belt on inside out (04/09/98)
343. Soccer (04/26/98)
344. MSNBC (04/26/98)
345. BBQ propane tanks not having an empty/full guage (05/26/98)
346. Godzilla '98 (05/27/98)
347. Supermarket Assholes (11/29/98)
348. Paper cuts (04/26/99)
349. Online auctions (04/29/99)
350. Ewoks and Tribbles (05/15/99)
351. People who press the elevator buttons even though they're already pressed (10/19/99)
352. The overuse of the word "official" (10/19/99)
353. Girls with Tattoos (11/12/99)
354. The plastic adhesive on CD cases (12/5/99)
355. Woodstock 1999 (12/12/99)
356. Little Havana (05/04/2000)
357. Everyone and their friggin' cellphones (07/28/2000)
358. Rednecks (06/25/2001)
359. The Jerky Boys (06/25/2001)
360. Carrot Top and his annoying commercials (11/20/2001)
361. Those annoying Mastercard "priceless" commercials (11/20/2001)
362. AOL and their annoying commercials during every commerical break (12/27/2001)
363. The annoying stuttering and over repeating in commercials (1/14/2002)
354. Those "can you hear me now" commercials (3/20/2002)
355. ACLU (7/29/2002)
366. Stuart Scott and his ebonics ESPN sportscasts (10/09/2002)
367. Overuse of the word "Absolutely" (10/27/2002)
368. "We will we will rock you" hundreds of times during a football game (10/28/2002)
369. "Like A Rock" commericals (01/05/2003)
370. Saudi Arabia (05/14/2003)
371. CVS Pharmacy (10/26/2003)
372. The Matrix & all it's incarnations (10/26/2003)
373. Oversaturation of car commercials (3/21/2005)
374. Carl Rove (11/13/2005)
375. Terrell Owens (11/13/2005)
376. Quiznos (11/14/2005)
377. American Idol (07/26/2006)
378. Employee Pricing car commercials (08/01/2006)
379. Outsourcing (08/08/2007)
380. Shipping and Handling overcharges (02/10/2008)
381. Stupid looking oversized celebrity sunglasses (02/10/2008)
382. Male body wash (06/28/2008)
383. Live Nation (03/13/2009)
384. Energy drinks (10/08/2009)
385. Trans fat, saturated fat and partially hydrogenated oils (06/25/2010)
386. People who use "your" instead of "you're" (11/1/2010)
387. Fantasy football (07/01/2011)
388. 3-D movies (09/19/2011)
389. The term "viral" referring to internet pictures and video (11/21/2013)
390. Movie remakes (12/5/2013)
391. The concept of Black Friday (11/28/2014)
392. Sucralose and Stevia (8/25/2016)
393. Food delivery services like Blue Apron (10/8/2016)
394. IPA beers (11/25/2016)
395. Japanese role playing games (JPRGs) (11/25/2016)
396. Wrapping paper (01/12/2018)
397. Vinyl albums in this day and age (02/02/2018)
398. Flip-flops (05/06/2018)
399. Carrageenan (08/13/2018)


Comments to garystrauss at freeshell dot org are always welcome.